Friday, March 23, 2007
What Makes A Spanko
Let us now return to the question of what makes a spanko.
First, I’d like to excerpt a comment that the famous Bonnie left me. As a note, the Bonnie indicated to me that she does not wish to be famous, so, for the time being, I shall refer to her as the infamous Bonnie. In any event, Bonnie eloquently opined:
Firstly, I find that I enjoy the term “spankoism,” so I shall make use of it for now.
Secondly, I think that this is a common feeling among spankos, and perhaps many non-spankos as well. We are born spankos. We can attempt to ignore that inclination, or we can explore and embrace it.
And, yet, this seems to my imaginary brain to be just a little too simple an explanation. One’s sexual likes and dislikes, I think, involve entirely too many factors to be genetic. Let us start with physical factors.
For simplicity sake, I’d like to present a couple of constants for the following discussion. Firstly, the couple involved in any spankings in this discussions are known to each other, and are on friendly terms. It should not be assumed that two people are spankos. Second, the spanking is consensual. This way we do not have to consider how the scenario of a stranger coming up to you and suddenly beating your ass against your will affects the discussion. We will leave the seeming incongruence of a non-spanko consenting to a spanking for later.
The human tochas is one of the bodies major erogenous zones. Touching a butt, or having it touched, brings most everyone pleasure. So, it stands to reason that a spanking, when given or received as an adult, will bring some pleasure, at least residually. If you gently pat a persons tush, we all find it pleasant. If those pats get a little harder, there might be some mild pain, but, when stopped, the pain will quickly ease and, I believe, leave a pleasant feeling.
Now let’s jump ahead to the extreme, making those pats very, very hard. Those will be painful to almost everyone. But I believe that the residual will still eventually be pleasant. It may just take somewhat longer.
Note that this is not true for other parts of the body. For example, if someone were to smack my knee cap repeatedly and violently, I would not find any pleasure in it at all, even after the passing of considerable time.
So, my first conclusion, which you may or may not agree with, is that, everything else being equal, there is something that everyone would find pleasurable in a spanking.
Please bear with me as I am now about to contradict myself.
No one likes physical pain. We reflexively strive to avoid pain. The more the pain, the more we wish to avoid it. Unless one has a total loss of feeling, known but rarely occurring, I know of no one who would be able to rest their hand on a red-hot stove burner without quickly pulling it away, except perhaps for G. Gordon Liddy. Spankings hurt. Some can be considerably painful, such as having ones exposed bottom struck hard and repeatedly with a belt or paddle.
So, all things again being equal, conclusion number two is that everyone dislikes pain.
Now you see the contradiction. If spankings are painful, how can anyone find any pleasure in them? But if there are some aspects to spanking that are pleasant, how can anyone dislike them? More to the point, why do some of us like spanking, nay even actively seek them out, while others wish to avoid them completely and totally.
Since this discussion is currently centering on only the physical, not emotional, aspect of spanking, the answer is quite simple.
Some of us, those of us who proudly call ourselves spankos, choose to disregard the pain. This would be true of both those on the giving and receiving end of the spanking.
Now, you certainly cannot ignore the emotional aspect of spanking. Those are probably more powerful than the physical aspect. But this is a multi-faceted intellectual discussion and this is just the first facet.
I believe that this can help those of you with so-called “vanilla,” or non-spanko partners, become more amenable to spanking, especially if you are asking them to spank you. Their first concern is almost certainly going to be that they do not wish to inflict pain on you. If you tell them that it really doesn’t hurt, you are being disingenuous. Of course a spanking hurts. But if you say that you have chosen to look past the pain to the subsequent pleasure, your partner may become less squeamish.
At this point, my typing fingers are tiring. So I shall pause to ponder the emotional aspect of spanking before continuing the discussion.
What we have so far, however, does raise a couple of interesting questions.
1. Why do we choose to look past the pain? Is this the part we are born with?
2. Or is there something more? Is the choice conscious, based primarily on life experiences?
Is it possible that we are all, at least to some extent, spankos?
Everyone a spanko? Wouldn’t that be fantastic?
First, I’d like to excerpt a comment that the famous Bonnie left me. As a note, the Bonnie indicated to me that she does not wish to be famous, so, for the time being, I shall refer to her as the infamous Bonnie. In any event, Bonnie eloquently opined:
“I believe there is a inborn component. I suspect it's more an inclination than
a deterministic destiny. To me, spankoism is a akin to a personality trait, like
adaptability, for example. It can be developed to a certain degree, but for the
most part, we possess what is granted to us.”
Firstly, I find that I enjoy the term “spankoism,” so I shall make use of it for now.
Secondly, I think that this is a common feeling among spankos, and perhaps many non-spankos as well. We are born spankos. We can attempt to ignore that inclination, or we can explore and embrace it.
And, yet, this seems to my imaginary brain to be just a little too simple an explanation. One’s sexual likes and dislikes, I think, involve entirely too many factors to be genetic. Let us start with physical factors.
For simplicity sake, I’d like to present a couple of constants for the following discussion. Firstly, the couple involved in any spankings in this discussions are known to each other, and are on friendly terms. It should not be assumed that two people are spankos. Second, the spanking is consensual. This way we do not have to consider how the scenario of a stranger coming up to you and suddenly beating your ass against your will affects the discussion. We will leave the seeming incongruence of a non-spanko consenting to a spanking for later.
The human tochas is one of the bodies major erogenous zones. Touching a butt, or having it touched, brings most everyone pleasure. So, it stands to reason that a spanking, when given or received as an adult, will bring some pleasure, at least residually. If you gently pat a persons tush, we all find it pleasant. If those pats get a little harder, there might be some mild pain, but, when stopped, the pain will quickly ease and, I believe, leave a pleasant feeling.
Now let’s jump ahead to the extreme, making those pats very, very hard. Those will be painful to almost everyone. But I believe that the residual will still eventually be pleasant. It may just take somewhat longer.
Note that this is not true for other parts of the body. For example, if someone were to smack my knee cap repeatedly and violently, I would not find any pleasure in it at all, even after the passing of considerable time.
So, my first conclusion, which you may or may not agree with, is that, everything else being equal, there is something that everyone would find pleasurable in a spanking.
Please bear with me as I am now about to contradict myself.
No one likes physical pain. We reflexively strive to avoid pain. The more the pain, the more we wish to avoid it. Unless one has a total loss of feeling, known but rarely occurring, I know of no one who would be able to rest their hand on a red-hot stove burner without quickly pulling it away, except perhaps for G. Gordon Liddy. Spankings hurt. Some can be considerably painful, such as having ones exposed bottom struck hard and repeatedly with a belt or paddle.
So, all things again being equal, conclusion number two is that everyone dislikes pain.
Now you see the contradiction. If spankings are painful, how can anyone find any pleasure in them? But if there are some aspects to spanking that are pleasant, how can anyone dislike them? More to the point, why do some of us like spanking, nay even actively seek them out, while others wish to avoid them completely and totally.
Since this discussion is currently centering on only the physical, not emotional, aspect of spanking, the answer is quite simple.
Some of us, those of us who proudly call ourselves spankos, choose to disregard the pain. This would be true of both those on the giving and receiving end of the spanking.
Now, you certainly cannot ignore the emotional aspect of spanking. Those are probably more powerful than the physical aspect. But this is a multi-faceted intellectual discussion and this is just the first facet.
I believe that this can help those of you with so-called “vanilla,” or non-spanko partners, become more amenable to spanking, especially if you are asking them to spank you. Their first concern is almost certainly going to be that they do not wish to inflict pain on you. If you tell them that it really doesn’t hurt, you are being disingenuous. Of course a spanking hurts. But if you say that you have chosen to look past the pain to the subsequent pleasure, your partner may become less squeamish.
At this point, my typing fingers are tiring. So I shall pause to ponder the emotional aspect of spanking before continuing the discussion.
What we have so far, however, does raise a couple of interesting questions.
1. Why do we choose to look past the pain? Is this the part we are born with?
2. Or is there something more? Is the choice conscious, based primarily on life experiences?
Is it possible that we are all, at least to some extent, spankos?
Everyone a spanko? Wouldn’t that be fantastic?
Comments:
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Hmmm, this is something I have often wondered myself. I struggled a lot with it when I was in my 20's. I was dead ashamed of myself when I was in my teens. But even before that, I was fascinated by spanking. I don't know if I was born with it, but I learned to read very early, and I remember memorizing spanking scenes in books I read them so often.
I still have issues with that side of myself. Even though I'm in my 30's now and have finally convinced my husband (who used to be hesitant, but is now enjoying spanking me. Frequently.) that it's not all bad, and found great blogs like yours where I know I'm not the only spanko out there, it's better.
Anyways, thanks for asking this and exploring it.
You are a great imaginary person!
I still have issues with that side of myself. Even though I'm in my 30's now and have finally convinced my husband (who used to be hesitant, but is now enjoying spanking me. Frequently.) that it's not all bad, and found great blogs like yours where I know I'm not the only spanko out there, it's better.
Anyways, thanks for asking this and exploring it.
You are a great imaginary person!
# posted by 
: March 31, 2007 8:40 PM
: March 31, 2007 8:40 PM
My Dearest Julie -
Thank-you very much for your comment. They are very kind words indeed. And it is always pleasing to me to hear stories of the journey of other spankos.
Regards,
Frank
Thank-you very much for your comment. They are very kind words indeed. And it is always pleasing to me to hear stories of the journey of other spankos.
Regards,
Frank
hi!
I'm glad i found this blog because at the moment I'm a bit confused about myself. I hope I'm not going on somebody's nerves I just need to share my thoughts with somebody.
I discovered that I like spanking, and I am only 15 years old! My parents never gave me any serious spankings, maybe a smack once but no bare ass spanking or something like that.
When I was a little child, spanking already faszinated me. I read passages in books about spanking again and again and i couldn't get enough of it. I never realized WHY i was so addicted to those scenes.
I also spanked myself when I was about ten, just to find out what it would feel like, i was really curious. It hurt a bit but i found it funny. Then a few weeks ago I read about corporal punishment in wikipedia and read about spanking on other websites. I saw an anime video where a girl got spanked with a book and I tried it out. I realized I realy adore this...I can't explain why it just flashes me. Then I get fanatsies about a sexy young man spanking me and that realy turns me on. I often thought about why that is. I guess if i need to be punished I am somehow naughty and I love to feel naughty. BUT now I've got some problems. If you are not too bothered by me maybe you could read them.
First I have a little conflict with myself because I am really against violence in education and I also think violence doesn't really solve problems. But on the other hand i love the feeling of beeing spanked and the whole issues drives me mad! I also love the thought of being punished by spanking. On the other hand I think if someone always spanks everybody he or she is not able to solve problems by talking.
Second I don't know how i should ever tell anybody! Usually I am a person who doesn't like keeping many things secret and I tell people about my feelings and stuff. But it would sound so strange...how should i tell them? I want to tell somebody but i just can't! I'm too scared of how they would react. They would surely not understand how I can fancy getting spanked. I haven't got a boyfriend so my fetish can't be satisfied!
Third I am so very ashamed of it! How come I like getting my ass beaten? Am I sick? And how stupid I must look by tossing a book at my backside. If anyone could see they would laugh their hearts out. horrible! I think none of my friends would understand...
Fourth I don't like the thought of hurting myself. That can't be healthy. But I'm so addicted to this feeling I spank ymself when nobody else is in the house. But I can't give myself a propper handspanking. I still dislike the thought of doing myself harm! And I am afraid that if my but is spanked too often, I am no longer sensible there...that I can't feel any lust if someone strokes my but. It is about hurting the body and maybe it can really cause damages.
Thank you for reading this if you did! I would be so happy about an answer or some advice! I'm really desperate!
I'm glad i found this blog because at the moment I'm a bit confused about myself. I hope I'm not going on somebody's nerves I just need to share my thoughts with somebody.
I discovered that I like spanking, and I am only 15 years old! My parents never gave me any serious spankings, maybe a smack once but no bare ass spanking or something like that.
When I was a little child, spanking already faszinated me. I read passages in books about spanking again and again and i couldn't get enough of it. I never realized WHY i was so addicted to those scenes.
I also spanked myself when I was about ten, just to find out what it would feel like, i was really curious. It hurt a bit but i found it funny. Then a few weeks ago I read about corporal punishment in wikipedia and read about spanking on other websites. I saw an anime video where a girl got spanked with a book and I tried it out. I realized I realy adore this...I can't explain why it just flashes me. Then I get fanatsies about a sexy young man spanking me and that realy turns me on. I often thought about why that is. I guess if i need to be punished I am somehow naughty and I love to feel naughty. BUT now I've got some problems. If you are not too bothered by me maybe you could read them.
First I have a little conflict with myself because I am really against violence in education and I also think violence doesn't really solve problems. But on the other hand i love the feeling of beeing spanked and the whole issues drives me mad! I also love the thought of being punished by spanking. On the other hand I think if someone always spanks everybody he or she is not able to solve problems by talking.
Second I don't know how i should ever tell anybody! Usually I am a person who doesn't like keeping many things secret and I tell people about my feelings and stuff. But it would sound so strange...how should i tell them? I want to tell somebody but i just can't! I'm too scared of how they would react. They would surely not understand how I can fancy getting spanked. I haven't got a boyfriend so my fetish can't be satisfied!
Third I am so very ashamed of it! How come I like getting my ass beaten? Am I sick? And how stupid I must look by tossing a book at my backside. If anyone could see they would laugh their hearts out. horrible! I think none of my friends would understand...
Fourth I don't like the thought of hurting myself. That can't be healthy. But I'm so addicted to this feeling I spank ymself when nobody else is in the house. But I can't give myself a propper handspanking. I still dislike the thought of doing myself harm! And I am afraid that if my but is spanked too often, I am no longer sensible there...that I can't feel any lust if someone strokes my but. It is about hurting the body and maybe it can really cause damages.
Thank you for reading this if you did! I would be so happy about an answer or some advice! I'm really desperate!
# posted by : April 08, 2007 7:47 PM
: April 08, 2007 7:47 PM
Dear Numb-Girl -
I apologize for taking so long to respond, and must further ask your indulgence just a little bit longer.
I can understand your confusion, as I have experienced it myself, and at roughly your age.
Please allow me a bit more time to consider your questions so that I may give you a properly-thoughtful response.
One more thing: I understand why you don't tell your friends that you find spanking arousing. However, try not to feel that you are alone. I assure you that some of your friends and classmates are also having some curious thoughts of their own that they are puzzling over. It may not be spanking, and, were you to discover their secret, you might find it pretty vanilla, yet they are thinking they they might be abnormal.
They are not abnormal, and neither are you.
Regards,
Frank
Post a Comment
I apologize for taking so long to respond, and must further ask your indulgence just a little bit longer.
I can understand your confusion, as I have experienced it myself, and at roughly your age.
Please allow me a bit more time to consider your questions so that I may give you a properly-thoughtful response.
One more thing: I understand why you don't tell your friends that you find spanking arousing. However, try not to feel that you are alone. I assure you that some of your friends and classmates are also having some curious thoughts of their own that they are puzzling over. It may not be spanking, and, were you to discover their secret, you might find it pretty vanilla, yet they are thinking they they might be abnormal.
They are not abnormal, and neither are you.
Regards,
Frank
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