Monday, June 04, 2007
A Spanking-Related Injury
I shall be traveling to the fine city of Toledo this week, where I will be meeting a long-time friend and attending a concert by my favorite musical groups. As a result, I may not be seen in the internet world for a few days. However, if you are in the vicinity of the Toledo Zoo in the next day or two and happen to spy me, feel free to come up and say “hi.”
I’d like to relate a brief story from this past weekend. Angela’s best friend, Bernie, and Maribel’s doting boyfriend were in attendance for an afternoon of hamburgers and hoops, although Maribel and Bernie, as well as my younger daughter Colette, totally refuse to eat “dead cow,” so there were turkey burgers and chicken breasts available, too. Maribel and Bernie believe that beef will ruin their athletic builds, and Colette thinks cows are too “cute” to eat.
Regardless of the diet preferences of the gathered, we were able to get a couple of spirited games in, although frequent rain made the driveway a bit sloppy. For once, I was teamed with Maribel, and we had great fun. I was shooting the ball poorly, but I was happy to handle the ball and let Maribel deal with the scoring duties.
During one of the rain delays, Maribel thought she had spotted the source of my shooting woes. “Dad, it looks like your right wrist is sore,” she said. “Did you hurt it?”
I responded, “I don’t remember anything specific, but I spent a lot of time working in the garden yesterday. I think it’s a little stiff.”
That response satisfied Maribel, and she gave me some suggestions on how to deal with the discomfort that she had gleaned from her basketball team trainer.
That being said, my reason for the injury that I gave to Maribel was a bald-faced lie.
The truth was that, while cooling off from gardening on Saturday, I was sitting in the guest house watching baseball. I was feeling some anxiety, and my favorite quick stress reliever is getting a good spanking. Since Angela was in the main house with Colette and a couple of friends, I decided that it was best to, shall we say, take matters into my own hands.
I have one of those miniature, souvenir baseball bat that I acquired at a minor league baseball game. It makes a nice little spanking implement, and can easily be handled by one who wishes to spank oneself. Not wanting to disturb Angela, I took up said miniature bat, removed my sweaty shorts, and proceeded to warm my bottom nicely.
Unfortunately, as my self-punishment was drawing to a close, I increased the intensity of my swings, and was snapping my wrist with gusto. It was at this point that I felt a twinge in my wrist and it began to hurt more than my butt. I like having a sore butt. I don’t like having a sore wrist.
Obviously, I can’t tell my eldest daughter, whom I’ll always consider my baby girl, that I injured my wrist whilst spanking myself. Thus, the story about gardening. Perhaps my hand had been weakened by the yard work and the spanking only “pushed it over the edge.” If so, then my stated reason was more of an exaggeration rather than a complete fabrication.
So now I am off on my adventure, with a wrap on my wrist and some light bruises on my butt. This band always puts on an excellent show, and the venue is alleged to be spectacular. I do believe that my trip will be fantastic.
I’d like to relate a brief story from this past weekend. Angela’s best friend, Bernie, and Maribel’s doting boyfriend were in attendance for an afternoon of hamburgers and hoops, although Maribel and Bernie, as well as my younger daughter Colette, totally refuse to eat “dead cow,” so there were turkey burgers and chicken breasts available, too. Maribel and Bernie believe that beef will ruin their athletic builds, and Colette thinks cows are too “cute” to eat.
Regardless of the diet preferences of the gathered, we were able to get a couple of spirited games in, although frequent rain made the driveway a bit sloppy. For once, I was teamed with Maribel, and we had great fun. I was shooting the ball poorly, but I was happy to handle the ball and let Maribel deal with the scoring duties.
During one of the rain delays, Maribel thought she had spotted the source of my shooting woes. “Dad, it looks like your right wrist is sore,” she said. “Did you hurt it?”
I responded, “I don’t remember anything specific, but I spent a lot of time working in the garden yesterday. I think it’s a little stiff.”
That response satisfied Maribel, and she gave me some suggestions on how to deal with the discomfort that she had gleaned from her basketball team trainer.
That being said, my reason for the injury that I gave to Maribel was a bald-faced lie.
The truth was that, while cooling off from gardening on Saturday, I was sitting in the guest house watching baseball. I was feeling some anxiety, and my favorite quick stress reliever is getting a good spanking. Since Angela was in the main house with Colette and a couple of friends, I decided that it was best to, shall we say, take matters into my own hands.
I have one of those miniature, souvenir baseball bat that I acquired at a minor league baseball game. It makes a nice little spanking implement, and can easily be handled by one who wishes to spank oneself. Not wanting to disturb Angela, I took up said miniature bat, removed my sweaty shorts, and proceeded to warm my bottom nicely.
Unfortunately, as my self-punishment was drawing to a close, I increased the intensity of my swings, and was snapping my wrist with gusto. It was at this point that I felt a twinge in my wrist and it began to hurt more than my butt. I like having a sore butt. I don’t like having a sore wrist.
Obviously, I can’t tell my eldest daughter, whom I’ll always consider my baby girl, that I injured my wrist whilst spanking myself. Thus, the story about gardening. Perhaps my hand had been weakened by the yard work and the spanking only “pushed it over the edge.” If so, then my stated reason was more of an exaggeration rather than a complete fabrication.
So now I am off on my adventure, with a wrap on my wrist and some light bruises on my butt. This band always puts on an excellent show, and the venue is alleged to be spectacular. I do believe that my trip will be fantastic.
